Here is one of my favorite inspirational sayings. It is attributed to Mother Theresa and is written on the wall at her Home for Children in Calcutta. It seems to be an adaptation of a poem by Dr. Kent Keith. You can find his original here.
People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends, and some genuine enemies.
If you are honest and sincere, people may deceive you.
Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today will often be forgotten.
Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.
Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway.
by Katalina Mau
All Rights Reserved
If you were only going to do one thing to improve your health, and your overall quality of life, it would be to quit smoking. Quitting smoking will improve your health, your appearance, and how you feel. You will be able to exercise easier and enjoy life more! No more standing outside the door in the rain for a cigarette! You can quit!
Quitting smoking isn’t easy, in fact it is one of the hardest things I have ever done! But if you really want to give up cigarettes, for good, you can! With a little planning, some determination, and an understanding of nicotine addiction, you will find you don’t need any pills, potions, or patches! In fact, the physical symptoms of nicotine withdrawal are intense for just about 3 days. Knowing that the physical withdrawl from cigarettes in only 3 days, most people can get through it on their own. It is the mental part that is hard. Plan to conquer your mental addiction to smoking and the physical addiction will take care of itself.
The thought of not smoking forever can be intimidating! After all, cigarettes have been a large part of your life. Talk yourself into quitting for an hour, then another hour, then another hour… I haven’t smoked in 169,492 hours. My next goal is 175,250 hours, or 20 years. I am sure I will reach it!
Cigarettes have become a ritual in your life. To quit smoking, you need to find new rituals to replace your smoking rituals. You probably smoke to start your day, to end a meal, while driving in the car. Probably the last thing you do each day is smoke a cigarette. Plan ahead! What will you do now that you don’t smoke? For me, chocolate chips did the trick. Instead of a cigarette I would take a single chocolate chip, let it melt slowly in my mouth, and totally enjoy the rich chocolate taste. (I bought the best chocolate chips I could find!) In the car I would chew gum, and at the end of the day, a nice cup of tea and a long kiss from my honey!
Find your reason to quit. Quitting is hard! You are not going to do it because someone else wants you to. Find a reason that really matters to you. For me, it wasn’t for health reasons that I quit. Lung cancer, heart disease, emphysema, those all seemed distant and unlikely. Second hand smoke, not a motivator, everyone around me seemed fine. Vanity was the key for me! I didn’t want to look like a smoker. I could see that smokers had more wrinkles, their fingers were yellowed, and their voices were hoarse and rough.
Money can be a great motivation. Smoking is expensive. When you don’t buy cigarettes you save tons of money! Giving up a pack a day habit will save about $5 in a day, $35 in a week, $150 a month or $1800 a year! And that is just the cost of cigarettes. Add in lighters and breath mints and you are talking serious money! Treat yourself with it! After a week, get a manicure to rid your fingers of those ugly yellow tobacco stains.
Remind yourself that life wasn’t perfect before you gave up smoking. One of the hardest times for me after I quit was when I got uptight about something. I just knew that a cigarette would calm me down and make everything all better. Of course, that wasn’t true. I would get tense and uptight while I was a smoker. So instead of a cigarette I would do some deep breathing, stretch, or take a brisk walk.
If you are a smoker, (now an ex-smoker!) chances are good that most of your friends are smokers too. Temptation will be huge when you are with friends. It wouldn’t be fair to have to give up your friends, so once again, plan ahead and come up with some strategies to resist temptation. You could try and get all your friends to quit with you. If that doesn’t work, try these suggestions. Find something you can do with your hands. Remind yourself of your reasons why you quit. Get a little silly. When I was out with friends I would smoke… without a cigarette! I would just pretend and go through the motions. Lighting up, a deep inhale and blowing smoke rings. If temptation got strong, I would think of dirty ashtrays and smoker’s breath. I would notice the yellow fingers and wrinkles of the smokers, and count how many hours it had been since my last cigarette. Anything except smoke a cigarette!
Know that you will always be addicted to cigarettes. Even after almost 20 years I still have moments when I want to smoke. I know people who quit for over 20 years and then started right back up in a moment of weakness. It does get much easier, but remember, you are only “a puff away from a pack a day!”
There is a story going around that I have heard attributed a number of different ways. I first heard it on Dr. Laura, and since then, I have heard it being identified as both a Cherokee and a Navajo story. Some just say Native American. But here it is in its expanded version.
said to his grandson,
who came to him with anger
at a friend
who had done him an injustice,
have felt a great hate
that have taken so much,
with no sorrow for what they do.
and does not hurt your enemy.
wishing your enemy would die.
with these feelings
there are two wolves inside me;
He lives in harmony
with all around him
does not take offense
when no offense was intended.
it is right to do so,
and in the right way.
the other wolf,
He is full of anger.
The littlest thing
will send him into a fit of temper.
all the time,
for no reason.
because his anger
hate are so great.
It is helpless anger,
for his anger will change nothing.
to live with these two wolves inside me,
try to dominate my spirit.”
into his Grandfather’s eyes
and quietly said,
“The one I feed.”
So now the question of the day is, which wolf are you feeding?
Today it was easy for me to feed the angry wolf. I had to drive to the airport and it seemed that everyone was against me. People were diving in front of me and driving stupid. Then I got stuck in traffic. Note to self:Pounding on steering wheel and yelling at other drivers does not make traffic go faster! I finally get home, decide to relax a bit and turn on the TV. I find politicians bickering, the news is just depressing, the movies are violent and angry. Even on the reality shows everyone is fighting with everyone else.
I think our society is spending too much time feeding the wrong wolf. To quote a few cliches,
“I know I can’t change the world, but I can try to change myself.”
“I can’t control what happens to me, but I can control my reaction to what happens to me.”
With those in mind I vow to try and change my reactions.
What would happen, if when I got stuck in traffic, instead of getting angry and pounding the steering wheel, I listened to one of my self-help CDs and enjoyed the extra time I had to myself? What if, when someone cut me off, I responded with humor, and gave them a friendly wave and a great big grin? What if I only watched TV shows that were uplifting and positive? What if I just removed all the negativity that I allow in my life?
And then, what if I took it a step further, and tried to actively feed the good wolf? What if, in the grocery store, I gave the mom with the screaming baby a friendly smile, and offered to push her cart for her? What if, when friends are gossiping, I change the subject by saying something nice? What if I turn off the TV and go for a walk?
What if everyone tried to feed the good wolf?
One of these days I will take the time to learn enough coding to make my own theme, and then maybe things won’t change so often!
The reason for today’s change is I wanted to encourage comments, so I have added DoFollow and Comment Luv. The theme I was using didn’t do well with them! If you are not familiar with Comment Luv, you’ll have to leave a comment to find out exactly what it does! I think you’ll like it!
So for now I have gone back to my tried and true, rock steady theme. Everything seems to work with it and it is easy to read.
Thanks for your patience!